So many goals, so little time...

Am I trying to do too much at once or is it possible to accomplish many things at the same time?

I have many plans. I am an expert at writing things into my appointment book. The trouble comes when I need to take action.

Why do I keep expecting the future-me to be less of a procrastinator than present-me? Is something magical going to happen between now and and when the next item on my calendar pops up?

It's almost like once it's on my calendar, I can ignore it. Heck, I already dealt with the issue/study plan/workout schedule/appointment by putting it on my calendar in the first place, right?

Perhaps my planning is not specific, measurable, attainable, realistically high, or time parametered enough? (10 points to whoever gets that one.)

Maybe I'm not the 'good' planner that I think I am. My planning consists of writing things on my calendar like 'run' or 'study' into certain time slots during the week. My phone alerts me to these events, but I still ignore them! Vague planning = deadly inaction when it comes to execute the plan?

I love running

but I still didn't get up early enough to go for a run before work today.

I blame the dog.

Facing reality?

Well, I've been making excuses for my lack of focus, scattered home life and lack of working out, etc. I've been using my (and Rich's) hectic travel schedules as a big excuse for why I'm not accomplishing the things I want to do.

Well, guess what!? Another work trip is in the process of being booked.

So, I can either keep on making excuses and keep on treading water and not getting anything done, or I can just accept that I'll be racking a lot more frequent flier miles for the foreseeable future. You can make all the plans you want for the ideal situation but if you're never home, you have to come up with another plan sometimes!

Ready, Aim, Aim, Aim...

A lack of focus won't help you get very far.

Ever have so many things on your to-do list or your want-to-do list that you just can't get started? Your focus split in so many directions that you get nothing done? That's how I feel right now. My only to-dos are work, study, workout, and occasionally hose myself off.

I can't decide if it would be better to workout before work and start work a little later or start early so that I can finish early and get many things done in the evening. So far, I haven't really been doing either. I get up early, wander around for a while (usually get sucked into the time vampire aka the Internet), eat breakfast and then go to work. Then, after work, I sit on the computer again to "unwind", which just leads to more time suck and then, next thing I know, I'm wasted all my workout time and soon will be bleeding away my study time too. Eat supper, get on the computer again (I don't know how this keeps happening!) and before I know it, there's maybe an hour left for studying before it's time to go to sleep.

Part of the problem is that my school work is all long distance and online. I find it very hard to study off of a computer after being on it for 8 hours for work and then several more hours of websurfing. It's so easy to open another website and then another because it's far more interesting than the subject at hand. In fact, right now, by writing this post, I am still procrastinating!

Should try to study = no studying is going to happen because I resent the fact that I "have" to do this uninteresting activity.

Want to study = is a lie I tell myself.

Plan to study (it's even on the schedule) = lies I tell to others and myself.

Want to pass the course and finish CGA = the truth at last but difficult to achieve without putting in the time.

So close to being done. AARRRRRGGGGG!!!

If you're just going through the motions...

Almost done my CGA but lately, I feel like I'm just going through the motions when it comes to studying for my course. I'm having a hard time focusing on what I need to be doing and I'm falling behind quickly. I just want to be done with studying and I'm having a really hard time staying interested. Maybe I've just been in this program too long? Helpful tips to get me through one of my last courses are welcome.

Why working at home is both awesome and horrible

I think this sums it up nicely: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/working_home

It's happened again. It's Wednesday (I think) and I haven't left the house since Sunday and have no immediate plans to do so. At least I showered today.

Happiness

Is becoming more comfortable with your core misery, a form of happiness?

What does it mean to you, to be happy? Does it just mean freedom from misery or is it a fleeting feeling of joy; a high that doesn't last? How long can one sustain feelings of euphoria from new experiences? Is it the relentless pursuit of happiness that make us do stupid things like spend money we don't have on things we don't need? Why do humans adapt to their environments so darn fast and lose that high so quickly?

Silly TV shows! You're not supposed to make me think!

Secrets Of Running Speed at Runner's World

Hmmm... Sounds like a good list, but I think you can't get faster if you don't run at all!

Secrets Of Running Speed at Runner's World

UH OH!

I really don't know who's reading this, do I. Since there is a severe drought in the comments section, I sometimes forget that people might actually be tuning in to my occasional musings.

Gee, if I had known that people were actually reading this, I might actually update more often!

Anywhoo... Day 30 of marriage and I have been on the road for about half of that. Sometimes, we seem to be playing tag team with who is home when with the dog. September may see some easement in my travel schedule, but probably not with Richy's yet. Maybe I can start to settle into something of a routine, especially when school starts. Being on the road all the time, sure can take it's toll on your health: never any time to exercise and always eating in restaurants. I don't want to see another menu for a while!

I'm in the process of changing to my family name. What a pain in the butt! I guess if you change your name when you're young and don't own anything, it's not so hard. But, as a 30-something year old property owner, the list of where and how you change your name gets a bit longer. I decided to change my name because I think it means we're a team, with the same goals and life directions in mind. I think my decision was made easier because of how common my last name was; wasn't the last of my name in my generation or anything like that. Now, to decide how my new signature is going to look... retrain the brain to sign the new way is going to be fun!

If you blog and no one reads it...

If you make a blog entry and no one reads it, does it still make a (sound)?

Only a few more hours til I pick Rich up at the airport.  We've been married 19 days and have only been together for about 8 of them, and only about 4 of those days we were on our own.  Are we missing out on something?  The inital bonding period?  Or has that already happened since I moved in about 3 months before our wedding day?

Anywhooo... the wedding day was a huge party and everyone seemed to really enjoy themselves.  It was day 5 of a 10 day party since we had so many out of town guests come to visit us.  I really enjoyed seeing everyone have such a good time.

Now, on to improving my golf game.  Rich isn't going to make beating him be easy!  I figure that it will take me a few years before I get there, but maybe he'll start losing sleep when my scores start creeping up on his.

Married Feels Different

I feel a little different, now that I'm married. I feel more secure and grounded, in a way; it's hard to explain. I know that marriage often is not permanent and that even people who stay married, can drift apart after the years. It will be hard work, but worth it.

Important ingredients: common goals and communication, no expensive drug or gambling habits, respect for each other and making sure we have enough cuddle time.

Sigh... if only I didn't have to travel after only a week after getting married...

I take things too personally

I take things too personally. At work, in business, when people decline on the wedding invitation RSVP...

I take things too personally, but how can I not? I take criticisms of my work as direct criticisms of me. I feel far too much responsibility for my tenant's happiness and wonder if I'm doing the right thing in renting out my condo. I jump every time my phone rings because I think there's something wrong at the condo. Every time someone RSVPs 'No', I'm a little sad. Isn't that silly? Maybe I need to harden my heart for certain things; things that don't really matter or need so much of my emotional energy. If someone doesn't like what I make for dinner, I have hurt feelings (so much so that I don't like to cook for others very often). Geez...

I don't want to be so sensitive, but I also don't want to be a callous jerk. How does one find balance in this?

Staying cool... maybe a little too cool...

While my friends and family are enjoying unseasonably hot weather in Winnipeg, I am enjoying unseasonably cool weather in Kelowna. I take small comfort in the fact that I haven't had a sunburn or heat stroke yet.

Went for a makeup test for the wedding yesterday. I think it went well. Still not sure if I'm going to try doing this on my own or getting the makeup artist to do it for me that day. Don't want to look bad in the pictures. I do have about 10 weeks to learn how to do this myself... Do I buy the product and practice and look pretty for the dog every day or just get the person to paint it on me?

Feedback appreciated...

Week 1 of Okanagan Living

I'm still trying to get used to the idea that I'm not here on vacation this time. That it's not temporary. That it's long-term.

Another sunny day in Kelowna. It's such a beautiful area but I don't think I should go on and on about it. I want people to come and visit me and see for themselves, not listen to me babble on about how nice it is while their weather is lousy. Believe it or not, I saw citrus trees at a greenhouse and they had fruit on them! I half suspect that they were imported that way or, they're never really outside for very long. We're not in a citrus producing area, so I'm still not sure what the whole deal is, but I'd really like it if my orange tree (that I brought with me) would at least flower now that it's out here. I also find the idea of a lime tree really cool. :)

Landlord status: at this point, still feeling more stressed out about it than I'd like. I still can't relax about it. I'm hoping that the dreams stop soon, as I don't want to worry about this the whole time. I guess that if the whole parking situation hadn't come up, I wouldn't be feeling like this. Still not sure if I'm cut out for this. I take things too personally most of the time. This is a business and I need to treat it as such.

As long as Rich keeps cooking for me, we'll get along splendidly. ;)

Wine and health

While researching the Mediterranean diet, I cam across some notes about red wine and saw something I really liked:

Wine and health - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia: "In his circa 375 BC play Semele or Dionysus, Eubulus has Dionysus say:
“Three bowls do I mix for the temperate: one to health, which they empty first, the second to love and pleasure, the third to sleep. When this bowl is drunk up, wise guests go home. The fourth bowl is ours no longer, but belongs to violence; the fifth to uproar, the sixth to drunken revel, the seventh to black eyes, the eight is the policeman's, the ninth belong to biliousness, and the tenth to madness and hurling the furniture."

All I can say is, SO TRUE! Who hasn't progressed through all these stages, or at least almost all of them. I'm not sure how large Dionysus' bowls were, but I think that they must have been quite large. This is a great reminder to drink in moderation, so as to enjoy the benefits of wine, but not to wake the demons that lie within.

In vino veritas ~~ In wine is truth

The binge before the purge storm

Next Monday is the start of a 12 week healthy living program that is being sponsored by work. I've been tracking my eating habits for the last week and it's BAD! I didn't think my habits were this awful. There are barely any vegetables and fruit but there is a lot of junk. The question is, is this brief window an accurate view of my long-term eating habits or is it a skewed vision because I'm eating extra bad because of the junk drought coming up? Mardi Gras is a good example of people engaging in this type of behaviour.

Am I flashing for beads or am I just a junk junkie?

Working from home can be hazardous to your pants

Or, at least it was for mine. They've all gone and shrank themselves somehow. Not really sure how it happened, but I really hope that it's not going to continue in the future. I refuse to buy bigger pants (silly, I know) but am not comfortable at all in the ones that I have now. I honestly was surprised that it happened, as I thought I was aware of how much I was eating and I attempted to be active everyday. Looking through my Beginner Triathlete log though, I see that I might not have been as active as I thought I was. And the eating thing? Who knows, as I didn't record anything for that.

I am drifting further and further away from Ironman shape. For the last 1.5 years, I've barely kept to any sort of a routine for more than a couple weeks at time. I moved, I started traveling for work a lot more, I started getting injuries... Those are excuses, I know, but that is what has kept derailing me from the track I want to be on.

Onwards and upwards, right? The past doesn't matter, what matters is what you do in the future.

Snowing in Kelowna

It's snowing for the first time while I've been in Kelowna this February. Every other day has been a mix of cloudy mornings and sunny afternoons. It's been a dry winter here. Last year I came here for a visit in March and there was still a lot of snow on the ground. I'm just thankful for the milder temperatures here.

12 days til my next CGA exam. I really need to buckle down and go hard for the next few days so that this can all be over sooner than later. I will be so happy when I have completed the CGA program. I can't wait.

In other news, is there a good way to turn down a potential job offer?

As lonely as you want to be

I've been away from Winnipeg for 10 days and I have another 9 to go. It's starting to sink in that I'm going to be away (far away) from everyone I know after I move. Hopefully, I'll be able to afford several flights a year to go back to see people.

Is loneliness just a state of mind?
Is this what everyone feels when they move away from home?
How can I get over this?
How long will it take for me to get over?

I think I might be ok with working from home. Mainly because I can set my own hours, don't need to commute, and don't need to get dressed in the morning. The coffee here is good and plentiful and cheap.

Now to tackle renting out my condo. Anyone interested?

I'm moving, dammit!

I plan on moving west the week of May 2nd. Hopefully, I can get together with friends and family a few times before I leave.

The Weighting Game and the Waiting Game

Well, down another pound this week. On Biggest Loser, that little would not be enough. In the real world, when up is too high, down is the way to go, no matter how little at times. When the down is slow, you need to take a look at what you are doing and make adjustments.

My plan right now is just to stay active, work on flexibility and to watch how much I'm eating and drinking. I'm proud to say that I've only had one drink this month and plan on continuing on the same track. I don't feel any better or worse for not drinking because I was never really drinking that much (except in December, of course). But, it's just the sheer volume of calories that were being ingested while drinking that were getting to me. By not drinking, I'm hoping to speed up my weight loss journey and get to a less-flabby, better power-to-weight ratio by the time race season starts up again. Less than four months to go til the first race.

Still trying to figure out when I will be moving to Kelowna. It's frustrating to not have a date pinned down, but at the same time, I'm not too eager to start looking for a tenant for my condo, looking for a new job, packing, etc. I also don't want to move out there if Rich is traveling 75% of the time, because, what's the point then? If it was more like 25% of the time or less, that would be ok.

The weeks are rushing by during this CGA course (one of my last ones!) but I'm having such a hard time just sitting down to it. I've probably said this before, but I am just so tired of it. So very, very tired. But if I don't finish, it will be like doing an Ironman and quitting when there are only 10k left to run.

Almost dying changes nothing.

Fresh year, fresh start?

Another New Year, another chance for New Year's resolutions. Mine, of course, are the same as what other people's are: lose weight, exercise more, move to a more temperate climate...

I didn't leave my condo this weekend from New Year's Eve, which was on Thursday, until Sunday afternoon. The only reason I left was because I ran out of milk and eggs! It was just too cold to leave until I absolutely had to! I'm so glad I have the option of working out in my home, as otherwise, my butt would have been on the couch 90% of my waking hours, instead of just 80%.

I ran on the treadmill this morning and after my run, I evaluated my performance. I was a little disheartened to see how much being a sloth for the last 16 months has slowed me down. At this point, I have totally reset myself, fitness-wise and weight-wise, back to where I was in 2005/2006. Slow and heavy. Ugh! After all my hard work, it just snuck back on so easily. It took 4 months to put on 16lbs after Ironman, and another 4 months to add another 5lbs. It's been holding steady every since and I'm finally sick enough of it to do something about it. I can't fit into any of my pants anymore! It's embarassing when I have to go see a customer and I show up in ill-fitting 'business attire' because I refuse to buy bigger clothes. I'm just lucky that I don't have to go out too often.

Unlike last year, I plan on running in at least one half marathon and actually racing in a triathlon this summer. Even if this means finishing BOP (back of the pack.) One of my friends is thinking of doing IMC 2011, but I'm going to hold out until 2012. Well, that's my plan at this point. A lot can happen between now and then...

I'm going to be working from Kelowna for two weeks in February. I plan to use this as a test run to see how working remotely will go. Two weeks probably will just give me a taste of it. I can't wait to get out there!